Oh My Lord! the drama that has happened in these past few days! I am living with a newly found friend named Abby and she is young and Married to a I guess " fellow " Marine and they seem to be happy and in love! Abby has Nanna living with her right now and it has brought up somethings that make me question my relationship with my boyfriend. I know that allowing someone to get into your head and make you doubt your relationship is wrong and childish. I am trying to not allow her to do this to us but its hard when so many guys treat there girlfriends differently then they way I am getting treated.
I know that he is a Marine and that things are going to be hard he has to go to work and he pretty much is always on duty no matter he happens to be at. I am proud to have such a great man in my life and I love how he is all about his job but I just thought it would be different and that maybe he would have more time for me. He is going to be going to see his daughter for like two weeks like 11 hours away from the town we live in and I know that when he gets there and hes spending time with her I will no longer get to even talk to him. He will be all about her and spending time with her. I know that he does not get to see her but like once or twice a year and that is crazy to me. I don't know how he will be able to deal with the not seeing his child, he is stronger then I am. I know he is a proud dad and that she is his everything but it makes me want to cry to think that he doesn't get to see her and talk about her day after she gets home from school. It hurts me to think that he will have to miss out on the things that most people don't even care about. The little things that no one but a parent would even care about and really that most parents don't even think twice about.
I am happy he is getting time with her right now even if it is a short period of time I just wish that he didn't have to go through having to see her for such a short time and could see her every day. I understand his reasons and that every little girl needs there mommy but I just hate that he has to be hurt like this. I'm sure he would never admit that anything hurts him but I know it does.
So far living with a girl who is with a Marine is harder then I thought it would be she is so young and thinks she knows everything and then it came out that her husband is getting kicked out of the Marine Corps due to failing a drug test. I thought I knew her better then that but as it turns out I really should not be around her lord only knows how living with her will hurt my relationship. I am doubting him more then I ever have in the past , I feel like he is lying to me every time I turn around and all for no reason he has changed how he is acting towards me from the point that we were living together to right now. I dont know what to think at this moment and its driving me crazy to the point that I feel like Im going to need to start getting away from the house for hours at a time with Nanna's more often before I mess up my relationship. I guess maybe I just need to remember that he is in love with me and I am in love with him .... what else matters?
back to life I go!
Semper Fi <3
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